Infidelity as defined by Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary
means ‘unfaithfulness in marriage or other moral obligation’. The
ambient of this definition extends to cover adultery, lesbianism,
sodomy, bestiality, forming of undue romantic interest in a third
party etc.
Sex outside marriage and other sought of unfaithfulness is
seemingly becoming a culture in some parts of our country and the
world in extension. These illicit sexual activities has been
orchestrated in magazines, videos, songs, cartons, comedy shows and
even in some religious organisations.
In some climes, there are some popular aphorisms of “no matter
what you do for a man, no matter how good you are to him, no matter
what you give to him, he will still cheat”, “men will always be
men”, one man can never be enough”, “awoden isitreke brusas” (man
can never sleep one sided) and many more.
The widespread of this deadly syndrome has as a matter of fact
become a nematode to the downfalls of many families and misfortune
to so many youths from divided households. It has also brought
lasting shame to many families and individuals in their course of
life on earth.
Considering how widely spread the nemesis emanating from
infidelity is, some have been moved to ask the well-meaning
question whether or not the Nigerian laws are silent on the issue
of infidelity invariably supposing to have curb this menace?
The quest for clarification of the above question has ipso
factor form the crux of this discussion. The positions of the law
in the southern and northern Nigeria will be dissected and
discussed seriatim, comparing and analysing same forensically.
As in addendum in helping to bring out the thrust of the subject
matter, references will be made to the scriptures as the grond norm
of the marriage institution.
In the northern states of Nigeria, Adultery (infidelity) is an
offence punishable under section 387 to 390 of the Penal Code of
Nigeria. The aforementioned provisions have defined the meaning and
scope of adultery to include both sexes having sexual intercourse
outside marriage to be guilty of this offence, stating their
punishments accordingly.
This simply means that adultery has been criminalised in the
northern part of our country and defaulters may be arraigned, tried
and convicted accordingly for the said violation of law, which may
in turn serve as a lesson and deterrent to others, making them
refrain themselves from such loose conduct, pushing the public
shame that accompanies it aside.
Adversely, in the southern part of Nigeria where the Criminal
Code applies as against the north, adultery is not a punishable
offence in the eyes of the law. This does not in any way promote
immorality and infidelity in matrimonial homes. How?
Adultery in southern Nigeria is still frown at by the regulating
laws. Infidelity is one of the grounds that an aggrieved party in a
marriage can raise in filling his or her petition of divorce in the
court of law. Put it differently, infidelity forms a valid ground
for dissolution of marriage.
In buttressing the above points, section 15(2)(b) of then
Matrimonial Causes Act states: “ The court hearing a
petition for a decree of dissolution of a marriage shall hold the
marriage to have broken down irretrievably if …the respondent has
committed adultery and the petitioner finds it intolerable to live
with the respondent”.
From the extant provisions of the above law, once the innocent
party has been able to lead evidence to prove the infidelity of the
other party, the court will consider the marriage to have been
broken irretrievably and will grant the prayers of the petitioner,
dissolving the marriage in question.
Beyond the dissolution, the consequences of marriage dissolution
should not be kept in isolation. The cost of litigation to dissolve
the marriage should be considered, the faith of the children of the
dissolved family, the positions of the parents and the lasting
shame should also be put into consideration.
From the ecclesiastical jurisprudence, adultery is the one and
only ground for dissolution of marriage or divorce. “I say
to you that whoever divorces his wife, except on the grounds of
sexual immorality, and marries commits adultery” -Matthew
19:9.
More than the divorce that the innocent party may seek; does it
mean that the defaulted partly will only go with the emotional
pains and nothing else? What does is the take of the originator of
marriage institution? What will be the possible punishments in his
eyes?
Hebrews 13:4 answers accordingly it accordingly. It sates: “Let
marriage be honourable among all, and let the marriage bed be
without defilement, for God will judge sexually immoral people and
adulterers”
The above scripture attests to the fact that no matter how
infidelity is widely spread and practiced, it does not in any way
mitigate its punishment or change it status as a sin in the eyes of
our creator who will judge us accordingly. The long duration of
indulgence in this wrong practice will never perfect its sinful
status to a good one.
Fellow Nigerians, before we resort to evoking our constitutional
powers under section 6 (6) (b) of approaching the court of law to
ventilate our grievances, seeking for divorce when cases of
infidelity arises, we should always sit back to reconsider the
possible outcomes of the actions we are about taking, it is better
to be late than late.
From the forgoing, it has been deduced that infidelity is
legally and morally wrong thus we should refrain ourselves from it.
The shame, trauma, bad name, human and divine punishments should
deter us from thus unwholesome practice.
If we don’t wake up to fight this nemesis before this world
permeated with immorality eat us up, our future generation will
suffer to the extreme as broken homes and wayward children will
keep on increasing on daily basis due to dissolution of marriages
triggered by the untold level of infidelity.
Enough is enough; let’s use our senses and consciences.
Edikan Ekanem is a contemporary writer and a columnist.
He can be reached at 08130015006 or eddy4jah@gmail.com
Infidelity as defined by Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary
means ‘unfaithfulness in marriage or other moral obligation’. The
ambient of this definition extends to cover adultery, lesbianism,
sodomy, bestiality, forming of undue romantic interest in a third
party etc.
Sex outside marriage and other sought of unfaithfulness is
seemingly becoming a culture in some parts of our country and the
world in extension. These illicit sexual activities has been
orchestrated in magazines, videos, songs, cartons, comedy shows and
even in some religious organisations.
In some climes, there are some popular aphorisms of “no matter
what you do for a man, no matter how good you are to him, no matter
what you give to him, he will still cheat”, “men will always be
men”, one man can never be enough”, “awoden isitreke brusas” (man
can never sleep one sided) and many more.
The widespread of this deadly syndrome has as a matter of fact
become a nematode to the downfalls of many families and misfortune
to so many youths from divided households. It has also brought
lasting shame to many families and individuals in their course of
life on earth.
Considering how widely spread the nemesis emanating from
infidelity is, some have been moved to ask the well-meaning
question whether or not the Nigerian laws are silent on the issue
of infidelity invariably supposing to have curb this menace?
The quest for clarification of the above question has ipso
factor form the crux of this discussion. The positions of the law
in the southern and northern Nigeria will be dissected and
discussed seriatim, comparing and analysing same forensically.
As in addendum in helping to bring out the thrust of the subject
matter, references will be made to the scriptures as the grond norm
of the marriage institution.
In the northern states of Nigeria, Adultery (infidelity) is an
offence punishable under section 387 to 390 of the Penal Code of
Nigeria. The aforementioned provisions have defined the meaning and
scope of adultery to include both sexes having sexual intercourse
outside marriage to be guilty of this offence, stating their
punishments accordingly.
This simply means that adultery has been criminalised in the
northern part of our country and defaulters may be arraigned, tried
and convicted accordingly for the said violation of law, which may
in turn serve as a lesson and deterrent to others, making them
refrain themselves from such loose conduct, pushing the public
shame that accompanies it aside.
Adversely, in the southern part of Nigeria where the Criminal
Code applies as against the north, adultery is not a punishable
offence in the eyes of the law. This does not in any way promote
immorality and infidelity in matrimonial homes. How?
Adultery in southern Nigeria is still frown at by the regulating
laws. Infidelity is one of the grounds that an aggrieved party in a
marriage can raise in filling his or her petition of divorce in the
court of law. Put it differently, infidelity forms a valid ground
for dissolution of marriage.
In buttressing the above points, section 15(2)(b) of then
Matrimonial Causes Act states: “ The court hearing a
petition for a decree of dissolution of a marriage shall hold the
marriage to have broken down irretrievably if …the respondent has
committed adultery and the petitioner finds it intolerable to live
with the respondent”.
From the extant provisions of the above law, once the innocent
party has been able to lead evidence to prove the infidelity of the
other party, the court will consider the marriage to have been
broken irretrievably and will grant the prayers of the petitioner,
dissolving the marriage in question.
Beyond the dissolution, the consequences of marriage dissolution
should not be kept in isolation. The cost of litigation to dissolve
the marriage should be considered, the faith of the children of the
dissolved family, the positions of the parents and the lasting
shame should also be put into consideration.
From the ecclesiastical jurisprudence, adultery is the one and
only ground for dissolution of marriage or divorce. “I say
to you that whoever divorces his wife, except on the grounds of
sexual immorality, and marries commits adultery” -Matthew
19:9.
More than the divorce that the innocent party may seek; does it
mean that the defaulted partly will only go with the emotional
pains and nothing else? What does is the take of the originator of
marriage institution? What will be the possible punishments in his
eyes?
Hebrews 13:4 answers accordingly it accordingly. It sates: “Let
marriage be honourable among all, and let the marriage bed be
without defilement, for God will judge sexually immoral people and
adulterers”
The above scripture attests to the fact that no matter how
infidelity is widely spread and practiced, it does not in any way
mitigate its punishment or change it status as a sin in the eyes of
our creator who will judge us accordingly. The long duration of
indulgence in this wrong practice will never perfect its sinful
status to a good one.
Fellow Nigerians, before we resort to evoking our constitutional
powers under section 6 (6) (b) of approaching the court of law to
ventilate our grievances, seeking for divorce when cases of
infidelity arises, we should always sit back to reconsider the
possible outcomes of the actions we are about taking, it is better
to be late than late.
From the forgoing, it has been deduced that infidelity is
legally and morally wrong thus we should refrain ourselves from it.
The shame, trauma, bad name, human and divine punishments should
deter us from thus unwholesome practice.
If we don’t wake up to fight this nemesis before this world
permeated with immorality eat us up, our future generation will
suffer to the extreme as broken homes and wayward children will
keep on increasing on daily basis due to dissolution of marriages
triggered by the untold level of infidelity.
Enough is enough; let’s use our senses and consciences.
Edikan Ekanem is a contemporary writer and a columnist.
He can be reached at 08130015006 or eddy4jah@gmail.com
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