Season Kick-Off Optimism: The Liverpool FC 2020/2021 Squad Wish List

Hoping for the best, but expecting the worst, are you gonna
score the ball or not?

Just like that, we’re mere days away from the kick-off of the
2020/2021 season. This new season sure snuck up on many of us who
have been bathing in the warm afterglow of champagne and good
feelings in the wake of our league title victory.

And as the Reds prepare to start the defence of their Premier
League title, we start our couch-watching season with a big tub of
kool-aid, some prayers and goals of our own for the first-team
squad.

Goalkeepers

Alisson Becker: Less untimely injuries before
crucial Champions
League ties, please. And maybe this year, Ali can save a
penalty. Oh, and he has to play some guitar with Jamie Webster, whenever
audiences are allowed.

Adrian: Carabao and FA Cup ties
only, please. Also, the whole
thing where Adrian rented out an empty stadium to showcase the
three medals he won over the season was rather bizarre, but if it
means we win another three trophies this season… I’ll allow it.

Loris Karius:
It’s unlikely that Loris will stay in Merseyside in the long-term,
but it’s genuinely been nice to see him happy in training. I hope
he finds a new, less problematic club and that he continues
whatever’s been working for him, whether it’s going to therapy or
uploading thirst traps on Instagram.

Defenders

Trent Alexander-Arnold: The Professional
Footballers’ Association Young Player of the Year managed to smash
his assist record from the previous season so a third consecutive
record tally would be nice. May Trent also continue occupying space
throughout the city with more murals done in his honour.

Virgil van Dijk: The big Dutchman was the only
Liverpool FC player to feature in every league game
last campaign, and that Iron Man quality will undoubtedly be
critical to a successful title defence. Big Virg tormenting a young
Evertonian on Kop Kids was also a welcome addition to
LFC viral content. I’m also hoping for more sightings of VVD
dancing to techno since that means we’ve won something.

Joe Gomez:
Big Joe has been looking shaky since the restart. Here’s hoping he
recovers his 18/19 form. Do whatever you have to big man, even if
it’s baiting Sterling into another fight while on international
duty.

Andy Robertson: The ever-pressing Scotsman
looks set to continue his assist duel with Trent. With the latter
starting the season off hampered by an injury, Robbo’s edge in
sharpness may be what wins it for him this time.

Neco Williams: Our backup right-back scored a
game-winning goal for Wales this past week. Who knew this was in
his locker? Save some of this magical pixie dust for your club,
please.

Kostas Tsimikas: Get well soon, Kostas!

Joel Matip: Our magnificent striding giraffe
misses too much time on the injury list. Here’s wishing for less
niggling injuries this season so he can romp through the plains of
Anfield.

Midfielders

Fabinho: Fab displayed more of his offensive
arsenal last season, with a couple of long-range bangers and lovely
scooped through balls into the box. More of that. He’s also
displayed some rather obvious match sharpness issues when playing
after any extended breaks so it’ll be great if he can avoid missing
regular game time, mmkay?

Georginio
Wijnaldum: *hoarse crying*
der der der der der der please stay Wijnaldum…

James Milner:
Our ever-reliable vice-captain doesn’t have to play backup
left-back anymore! Rejoice! I’m looking for dependable minutes from
Mr Ribena and for him to deliver clutch late penalty heroics once
again. Any flashbacks to when Milner became the leading assists man
in a single Champions League campaign would be a giant bonus.

Naby Keita: Number 8 is our best bet towards
improving goal contributions from midfield as defences scramble to
stop our fullbacks. Naby finally had a run of games after the
restart and looked pretty good in them. I also wish for more of his
personality to shine through. It feels like he’s been at the club
for a while already, and I still have no idea who he is at all.

Jordan
Henderson: Our captain had a
phenomenal season so it’s tough to see where else he could improve
on. Other than providing leadership and doing the dirty work in
midfield, I foresee a screamer or two in his locker this season.
Another “Internet-breaking” video like the Chaokoh Creative Pitch
Meeting would be the cherry on top of everything.

Alex
Oxlade-Chamberlain: The Ox always
brings a different dimension to the midfield with his directness
and nose for goals, but I’d like to see him take a step with his
final ball delivery. A plea for no Ox on the wing, unless
absolutely necessary, Jurgen.

Curtis Jones: I’d like to see the scouser who’s
more scouse than you follow in the footsteps of a certain someone
who also wore the number 17 jersey. No pressure. Jokes aside, I
expect Curtis to play even more than the man he’s replacing
(Lallana) and provide energy and some creativity to a midfield that
can go through some dry spells at times. If he’s able to do that
and bag goals that embarrass Everton along the way… *chef’s
kiss*

Harvey Elliot: I don’t expect Harvey to feature
all that much other than cup games and coming on as the human
victory cigar. However, the question I have is: is he going to cut
his hair now since he’s just bagged his first goal for LFC, or does
he wait for his first competitive goal before moving on from his
hairstyle?

Attackers

Roberto
Firmino: A repeat of last season’s
home goal drought must not happen. Beyond that, I expect Bobby to
continue dazzling on or off the ball and continue his one-person
campaign to redefine assist celebrations.

Sadio Mane:
One of our best performers from the past season, I expect Sadio to
go from strength to strength and perhaps make a strong push for a
top Player of The Year type award in England or Europe. Oh, and
keep on smiling my man.

Mohamed
Salah: Mo remains the spearhead of
our attack. It’d be nice if his goal tally tipped a little to his
17/18 levels. He was also making some progress with using his
weaker right foot as the season went along, and that would
undoubtedly be a welcome development as defences continue to give
him their fullest attention. More tweets to Dejan Lovren showcasing his budding new best
friend in Kostas would be very welcome.

Takumi Minamino: The
King of Pre-Packed Gyoza Cooking looked sharp and more
comfortable in the last few games of the restart and this
pre-season, so I expect him to garner the lion’s share of the
non-front three minutes. Those three have played a crazy amount of
football over the past three years, so expect plenty of minutes for
Taki. I’m tossing a coin in hopes of double-digit goal
contributions from the tireless Japanese attacker.

Rhian Brewster: Whether he stays at Liverpool
or goes on loan, Punky Brewster’s going to score goals. This guy’s
too much of a natural goalscorer to not play. How much he scores
though, depends on the club he plays for this season. I think he
goes on loan to another Premier League club and scores more than
ten goals, cementing himself as a bonafide PL goal-getter in the
process. Fingers crossed.

Xherdan
Shaqiri: Shaq played so little last
season, and it seemed like he would have left the club if not for
COVID-19. Somehow, he still managed to get on the scoresheet
against our blue neighbours. Any improvement would have to begin
with him being available for squad selection. It’s a very low bar
for the Swiss man to clear. Here’s hoping for one sweet free-kick
goal from him.

Divock Origi:
Planet Divock started brightly last season, but seemed to disappear
as the season trudged along. I’m hoping for some easy goals for our
favourite zen striker, and continued misery for Everton while
Divock celebrates sheepishly.

What about you? Think someone will score from the halfway line?
Reckon a youngster like Sepp van den Berg could nail a spot in the
rotation? Let us know in the comments.